In this article, I will explain how to convince someone, be it woman, man, a client, your parents, children and in general to any person. Developing this skill will help you both in your professional and personal life, as it will allow you to influence other people.
If the person you are trying to convince has prior knowledge or experience of what you are dealing with, your goal will be to change their beliefs and “suggest” that there are others. After that, you can present yours.
If the person does not have prior beliefs of your proposal, you can start talking about them.
How to convince others? 18 Practical forms
1-Look for a need to solve
Think of the different needs to be met from the Maslow Pyramid.
Sure you can find something to solve in the other person, some need that the other person is seeking to cover: from being hungry (physiological need), going through wanting to learn social skills (need for social adaptation) or traveling and knowing the world (need to self-realization).
If you know what need is the one that has less coverage the person to convince, offers a reward. There is nothing wrong with this, it is a simple exchange.
The reward can be from economic to do a job, teaching to do something, etc. Find something that does not cost you too much. For example, if you are an electrician, you can give in return the arrangement of some appliance.
3-Create urgency and scarcity
Transmitting a sense of urgency is communicating to the other person that your product or proposal will not always be available.
On the other hand, transmit scarcity is to communicate that your product or your person is limited and that at any time you can go or spend.
4-Choose the right time
If you want to convince someone of something, choosing the right time will be important to get the best result. If you talk to people when they are more relaxed, open and in a good mood, you will be more likely to give in to your requests or proposals.
Also, people are more influenced if they feel in debt for something. If someone thanks you for something, it’s the perfect time to ask a favor. There is nothing wrong with asking favors, as long as you do not lack the respect of the other person.
5-Know the people and find out what they want
If you build rapport and you like your client, friend or relative, it will be much easier to convince you of what you want. If you do not know the person well, it is necessary to do it and find points in common among you, in addition to communicating them. People often feel more secure and comfortable with people who look like them.
Another point to remember is not to talk too much about our lives and talk much more than what the other person likes. Ask questions to find out what he likes and is passionate about, then ask questions about what he likes and finally convey that something also interests you.
6-Affirm your intentions
To make your opinions clear and what you want, use affirmative phrases. If you do not like your partner to go out at night, say: “I would like you to come out more with me at night”. If you want your child to study, say “this afternoon you have to study and finish homework” instead of “you are not studying anything”.
Talking affirmatively will help you to make your intentions clear and avoid misunderstandings.
If, for example, you have to convince a partner to participate with you in a business, give proof that it will work.
Provide clear evidence to support your proposals, arguments, and ideas. The more evidence you can give to support and strengthen your argument, the less skeptical the other person will feel and the easier it will be to convince her.
It is not about being heavy, but about trying to keep the proposal in mind of the other person and do not forget it.
When you see it, you can talk a little about what you want to convince and then talk about something else, continuing to talk about the subject only if the interlocutor is interested.
9-Believe in your idea
If you do not believe in your idea, nobody will. This is logical because you will not show motivation, persistence, and enthusiasm when communicating it. When someone is convinced of an idea, he transmits energy and manages to let others create it as well.
This, for example, applies to entrepreneurs who believe that their idea is valuable; they usually transmit it to other people, they are persistent and often they build a business. The more convinced you are of your ideas or what you want to propose, the more confident and convincing you will be for others.
10-Use your non-verbal language
The non – verbal language an extensive section deserves. Did you know that 93% of effectiveness in human communication is determined by non-verbal language?
The influence and impact of our communication are determined by:
- 55% nonverbal language
- 38% paralinguistic elements.
- 7% verbal content
Being a leader of an organization or a television presenter requires that we communicate effectively with others. How do we get it? How can we influence others using our non-verbal language?
Some aspects of effective non-verbal and paralinguistic communication are:
- Look: direct, horizontal and relaxed. With it, you can indicate that you attend to the other person and you are interested. Do not keep it too fixed because it can be interpreted as intimidating.
- Facial expression: expresses the emotional state and indicates attitudes towards what is said or heard and towards the other person. You must show a facial expression consistent with what you say.
- Smile: be sincere and consistent with the situation. Indicates a close and friendly attitude. Incoherent or unnatural smiles have the opposite effect.
- Posture: right and relaxed. Neither excessively firm nor excessively relaxed. Communicate attitudes and emotions.
- Power posture: If you want to feel more powerful or stronger, adopt a “power posture”. Researcher Carney found that when people sat or stood in a position of power, they felt more powerful and also increased their testosterone level. This posture requires you to expand: open arms and legs and keep them uncrossed.
- Gestures and facial movements: clarify or support what is said, indicating attitudes and moods. Avoid repetitive gestures and show gestures consistent with your mood.
- Distance: the closer the relationship, the less personal distance there will be.
- Personal appearance: transmit an appearance physically and psychologically cared for.
- Language: speak clearly and fluently. The tone of the voice shows attitudes and moods. Avoid monotony and think about what you are going to say to avoid misunderstandings.
If you pay attention to charismatic leaders, you will be able to observe that very often they show positions of “power”; it is an open position that transmits self-confidence.
Imagine convincing someone of how good you are or how good your product is with closed arms. This will make you look smaller, less persuasive and without confidence in your own product.
Therefore, on the next occasion, when you try to convince others: look with your head straight (not down), with your shoulders back and your back straight.
12- Movement of the hands
When communicating with others, move your hands to accompany the verbal message. There is an investigation that confirms that we see more competent and confident people who communicate with gestures, compared with others who leave their hands still or in their pockets.
Hand gestures help the audience to visualize the message and to remember and understand the message better.
14-Imitate postures and actions of the person with whom you speak
This will build a rapport between both while facilitating communication.
15-Speed of speech
It must be determined by the situation. Talking slowly seems to make the communicator calm while speaking quickly seems reactive to external circumstances.
16-Changing voice tone and pauses
Two tricks to keep the attention of the audience (either one person or many) is to pause between phrases and make changes to your voice tones. Something as if it were the narrator of a story or story.
Talking in a high tone will make you look more anxious and nervous while speaking in a medium tone will make you look more confident and strong.
17-Smile and use the sense of humor
Ak smile will probably make the other person respond with a smile and lower their defenses. The same using the sense of humor.
Looking into the eyes of the person you want to convince can also help increase your level of influence. Do not leaders who speak to the public more convincing than those who read the speech?